~ ThE eNd iS CoMiNg ~

The day is coming and I'm so thrilled!! Nope, I'm not talking about the wedding, it's the last working day at my current workplace. After almost 2 years everything's gonna end in less than 10 days. Should I feel sad? No. Should I feel happy? Hell, I am! Hmmm.. but maybe a bit sad to leave 1-2 good colleagues but the rest is a total freedom..

Everybody starts leaving after new year.. Izs, Mas and Rita have already started their new lifes, Tini will leave 2 days before me, 2 weeks after is TLK and YHK will follow in a month later. There's nothing much to loose if I choose to stay except the keep changing new faces and triple workloads that need to be covered when people resign. One more thing, l don't have to go through the busiest peak time ever of the year this coming April - August and that's a big relief, Yeay!!

In the meantime, I'm just worried if I don't get a new job ASAP or at least by June. Deep down inside I'm still hoping to get a job with LHDN eventhough getting it means being apart from hubby-to-be, but that's a sacrifice I'd make for a better career and future. If the result is out by April and I don't make it, I guess I really need to concentrate on finding a job in Mr Don's hometown. On the positive side there's no worries on being weekend husband and wife!

I better start making a to-do list so I can be occupied for the whole 7 weeks before the wedding!! Oooooo, I'm so excited!!

~ PeOPle CaN bE sO wEirD ~

Why people sometimes like to be so judgemental and bias toward others?! It is more sad when they make conclusions based on the surface without knowing the truth or at least knowing the person..

Gossips, observation from afar, or should I say browsing someone's profile online wouldn't give you any justification. Although nowadays more people prefer less privacy by exposing their life through pictures and blogs entries on the virtual world, that wouldn't portray 100% of someone's life. There's a lot more in real life to be interpreted before you can label / judge a person.

After a long time, I did find out recently that the hatred might still be there. I thought by choosing to hide myself away / be low profile for the past 3 months would make someone stop saying bad things about me, but it didn't. I guess it'll never stop. It's not my right to judge that person either but I just can't stop wondering, what's the purpose?!

Nonetheless, I prefer to continue what I've done best for the last 3 months. I think I've made a very wise decision and my life couldn't be much happier. Lucky me to find out about this one thing (even if there's more, let it be..), at least I know that I've been on a clean slate long time ago and it's not my fault anymore if someone didn't..

~ iMaGinE by JoHn LeNNoN ~

Imagine there's no heaven
It's easy if you try
No hell below us
Above us only sky
Imagine all the people
Living for today...

Imagine there's no countries
It isn't hard to do
Nothing to kill or die for
And no religion too
Imagine all the people
Living life in peace...

You may say I'm a dreamer
But I'm not the only one
I hope someday you'll join us
And the world will be as one

Imagine no possessions
I wonder if you can
No need for greed or hunger
A brotherhood of man
Imagine all the people
Sharing all the world...

You may say I'm a dreamer
But I'm not the only one
I hope someday you'll join us
And the world will live as one

~ The 'No' and The 'Yes' ~

What happen when the 'No' is actually means 'Yes'?! Does it called being dishonest? Does it give impact on our life? Does it matter?

If u asked me a few months ago, I'd probably say it is indeed being dishonest, in fact it really matters and will give impact on our life.. Nowadays, my perception has changed a little bit. I'd say it does not matter anymore. People always say things which are not truly from their hearts. They tend to say things depend on situations which sometimes are good and on the other hands it might lead to something bad. We can't blame these people or even ourselves since every one of us has our own reasons to do that. If we needed a clarification for everything we do or other people do to us, it will be an endless story.

The important part is whether the truth should be accepted or not. If we knew the truth without even need to hear a 'Yes' or 'No' for an answer, just don't bother for clarifications why the 'No' is actually 'Yes' or why the 'Yes' means 'No'.. You see, truths will always be truths, a statement wouldn't change them.

For my scenario, I got a 'No' for an answer which is supposed to be 'Yes'. But since I already figured out the truth, I decided to accept it because it does not matter anymore and it won't affect my life in future. Who cares when the 'No' is actually means 'Yes' since it's merely a statement.. The answer is with you..

~ The Good and The Bad ~

I believe I'm better since da last emo entry.. It's been months now and no more emo, no more sadness, no more heart feeling.. Since I've made up my decision to take all those steps, now I'm finally at ease.. I shud haf started dat earlier, stupid me!

Life is gud.. I'm counting da days till my wedding in May.. But to be honest I'm quite scared and sad.. Scared dat I'm not really ready to be a wife and sad to be living away from my parents soon enuff.. I noe I shudn't feel dat way bcoz I'll be only 45-minutes-away from them.. But still it'll be hard for me to live without them being around 24/7.. Being da only child has made me attached to them since I was young.. They're da reason I'm staying in my hometown.. I rather forget all the fun living in big cities bcoz being wif them already made me happy..

There's only one thing which is not gud in my life rite now, it's my job.. Actually da job is OK but I cudn't stand da politics and da bad 'aura' going around in my workplace.. I planned to stay for at least 3 years to get my professional qualification but at dis moment I cudn't see myself working here for another 6 months.. Huaarrrggggggggghhhh!! I hate it.. I'm totally stressed wif da workload and da negative aura sorrounding me.. I'm still confused wif what shud I do rite now.. May God give me da answers.. Amin..